Sree Narayana Mission (Singapore)

Our Family, Our Service to the Mission

Asokan Raghavan

“Without the Mission, my family would have been different,” Asokan Raghavan declares.

His family’s association with the Sree Narayana Mission spans decades, from the 1950s, when his parents were active members, particularly in cultural events. “Mum was always involved in the Mission, in the singing and drama,” Ambika Raghavan shares. Their father had been a leading member of the Mission’s Cultural Committee. Mohandas Raghavan recalls, “A family outing would be to the Mission. On Sundays, we’d dress up and go there. We looked forward to that, because in those days of ‘kampung’ life, there were not many things to do. Sometimes, we even took a taxi to the Mission. So, it was very thrilling”.

The seven children in their family saw the Mission as their second home and the members as their extended family. “The Mission was very supportive and got the family more settled in Singapore. The members were always coming to our house, singing and recording songs,” Mohandas remembers. Like family, the Mission had been there for them in their time of need, “They financed Mum’s funeral and they also gave me a study loan for my university course in Australia,” Mohandas adds.

The exposure to the Mission during their impressionable years had left an indelible mark on the siblings. Ashokan has taken Sree Narayana Guru’s teachings to heart, “His words like, ‘Gain freedom through knowledge, strength by organisation,’ had a profound impact on me. These have been core values to me. The children of the members who did well in school and life became our role models. Mum never wavered in her beliefs and service to the Mission, so all of us grew up with that belief. Twice a week, from 5.30 to 10 pm, she’d be at rehearsals in the Mission with Dad, and since there were people who felt Mum is doing it for a good cause, they didn’t mind looking after us at home”.

The virtuous cycle of service that the siblings witnessed in the adults around them instilled the same values in their own psyche. Ashokan revealed, “Dad was a storekeeper in the British Ordinance Department and earning a meagre salary of $400 monthly, for all of us. Despite that, what helped us go forward were the values of the Mission. He made sacrifices for the Mission and made do on the meagre salary. It bonded us, to make sacrifices for the good of the organisation. I became a Life Member in January 1972, with the salary I received from National Service upon my promotion to Lance Corporal – I paid $50,” and he has continued serving the Mission. “It was drummed into us, that, no matter how poor, you must share with people – even if you have one slice of bread, share. We went to the Mission’s Home for the Aged and I learnt the value of empathy for people,” Ambika adds. Like Ashokan, she too continues to serve the Mission, even after moving to Perth, Australia, by editing its publications. Mohandas had picked up subtle lessons from the way the Mission was run, “It was important to be clean, studies and education is important. There was food after activities and we learnt to serve food”. He, too, has served the Mission on its Ex-Co and in other capacities.

“All of us are inspired by the Guru’s teachings; the family is united, there is a bonding among us,” says Ashokan. “We never strayed from the Guru’s tenet, ‘One in kind, one in faith, one in God, is man’ and as a family we are united in the same way of thinking,” Ambika explains. Mohandas sums it up, “We are all over the world but we are very close,” attesting to the strong ties that develop when families make the Mission part of their extended home and family.

Looking Back to Move Forward: Reminiscing about the Old Days

Asokan Raghavan

As a child, I have always been associated with the Sree Narayana Mission. There are lots of memories and some from back in the 1950s and 1960s, remain etched in my minds even after all these years. I would like to share some memorable moments and events.

Kadhaprasangam

Kadhaprasangam (lyrical narrative or story telling performance) is a performing art of Kerala, India. It combines speaking, acting and singing while presenting a story. My late mother, Mrs Sarada Raghavan, was a talented artiste and an exponent of Kathaprasangam. During the 1950s there was a sizeable proportion of Malayalees in the Indian community in Singapore. Many of them were migrants from Kerala and a large number of them were living at the Naval Base and Sembawang area. Kadhaprasangam was popular entertainment amongst them and had a large following. During this time, my mother gave at least two performances to raise funds for the building of Sree Narayana Mission. I remember one was held in Pasir Panjang and the other was in Sembawang. Attendance was by purchase of tickets and the events were well supported by the Malayalees.

Chief Minister David Marshall’s visit to the Sree Narayana Mission, mid 1950’s

During the mid-1950s, the then Chief Minister of Singapore, Mr David Marshall was a guest-of- honour for one of the Guru’s birthday celebrations. I accompanied my father to the event and it was held in an open field. A stage was erected at the edge of the field and chairs were placed in rows for the audience to sit. There was a huge crowd present. I remember seeing four men seated on the stage as a forum was in progress. It was dark, about 7.00 p.m. Chief Minister of Singapore, Mr Marshall Minister arrived. He was brought to the stage, garlanded and invited to speak.

Malayalam Drama, 1960

On 3 December 1960, a Malayalam drama, Puthiya Akasam, Puthiya Bhoomi was staged to raise funds for the Sree Narayana Mission. What was significant about this drama was that for the first time since the founding of the Mission, female roles were played by women. Prior to that, men had always portrayed women roles in the plays put up by the Mission. The pioneering female actresses were Mrs Sarada Raghavan, Mrs Vasanthi Pillai, Mrs Philo Augustine and Miss K Ganga Devi Menon. The drama was well received. Attendance was by sales tickets, which were all sold out. The local Malayalam paper gave a rave review of the drama and praised those ladies who participated in the drama

Photo

L to R: Miss K Ganga Devi, Mrs Philo Augustine, Mrs Saradha Raghavan and Mrs Vasanthi Pillai

Flag Day, 1961

In 1961, I was a primary three student at Nee Soon Primary School. The first Flag Day of the Sree Narayana Mission was held in May that year. It was on a Saturday, and in those days Saturday was a school day. However, I did not go to school that day with parental permission. Early morning, my sister and I started the street collection in the Nee Soon area, accompanied by an adult volunteer. There were many other children and adults who participated in the event as well. We carried a tin for the collection of coins and a box hung around our neck containing saffron paper badge with a pin attached to it, bearing the message of the Sree Narayana Guru. It was a tiring day for us, having to walk around, greet people and ask for donations. Some people were very nice but others not so. The officials asked us to stop our collection at about 6.00 p.m. The tins were then taken to the Sree Narayana Mission building for counting by officials and volunteers. The total collection that year was about $8000.

Mr Lee Kuan Yew at the Sree Narayana Mission on 12 September 1965.

I first met the then Prime Minister, Mr Lee Kuan Yew in March 1963 when I was a primary five student. He visited my school, Nee Soon Primary School and I remembered shaking his hand. I was over the moon with excitement.
Mr Lee Kuan Yew, had visited the Sree Narayana Mission on three occasions. His first visit was in 1963 during the General Elections campaign. The other two visits were in 1965 and 1967. These visits were made during the Onam and Chathayam celebrations at the Sree Narayana Mission respectively. Mr Lee’s visit in 1965 went down the annals of the Mission, as this was the first public engagement the Prime Minister attended after Singapore gained independence on 9 August 1965.

The Sree Narayana Mission celebrated Onam and Chathayam from 6 to 12 September in 1965. The packed programmes included prayers, music, dance, drama and a public forum. The latter was held on the last day, a befitting climax to the whole celebrations. I went with my father on that day and witnessed a huge crowd, mostly Indians, waiting for the arrival of the guest-of-honour, Mr Lee Kuan Yew. He arrived at 11am and was led away to meet members of the Sree Narayana Mission’s Executive Committee before proceeding to the Auditorium. The programme started off with a welcome address by Mr K Devadasa Panniker, the General Secretary, and this was followed by a speech by the President of the Sree Narayana Mission, Mr M K Bhasi. Prime Minister Lee addressed the audience in Malay and in English. Though, I was very young then, I admired his oratory skills. He was very articulate and spoke with deep passion. The audience listened with rapt attention and gave him a great applause.

After his speech Mr Lee presented scholarships, valued at $100 to 10 students and left the Mission at about 12.30 pm.

I had been involved in the activities of the Sree Narayana Mission over the years. I became a member in 1972, and served in the Executive Committee from 1978 to 2002. Sree Narayana Guru’s teachings has had a profound impact on my life. His words,

“Gain freedom through education”
“Gain strength through organisation”
“Gain prosperity through industry”

is still relevant to us in Singapore. It is about acquisition of new skills, teamwork and enterprise, all key factors to the progress of our nation.

Leading SNM

M.K. Bhasi

His village had been just a couple of miles from where Sree Narayana Guru had spent his last days. Thus, M.K. Bhasi had grown up influenced by the Guru’s philosophy. “I was interested in his teachings, because of the secular nature of his teachings. He went against all the old convictions and beliefs of the communities and society. I was guided by his main teaching, ‘That the human race is one’. It is a unique teaching – to be a good human being, you can still be without a religion. How many others have said it? No one has said it so openly. He built temples – not to propagate religion but education”.

It was, therefore, natural for Bhasi to gravitate towards the Sree Narayana Mission when he landed in Singapore in 1953. The Mission had been registered just five years prior. Not only was it a familiar entity, it was in keeping with his own secular values, “I have never worshipped in a temple. My wife used to go but I never entered”. At the Mission, Bhasi could apply the Guru’s principles, which resonated with him. The Mission operated oblivious to its members’ religious beliefs. In due course, Bhasi was elected into the Mission’s Executive Committee. “I had Muslims in my Committee and all others in my Committee,” he recalls.

Bhasi has held the position of Mission’s Ex-Co President for a total of 17 years; a record in Singapore’s social service circles. He had also been its Vice-President for two years and one of its Trustees for a few years. “My name was proposed at meetings and there were no other proposals. So, I found it difficult to decline,” Bhasi explains his extensive years of leadership in the Mission. His sense of wanting to live according to the Guru’s values must have also prompted him to continue leading the Mission in the face of any hurdles he faced. “I always believed that in public service, you won’t get anything in return. Instead of thanking you, people will be blaming you. That has been my attitude from the beginning. I did what was necessary. I tried to do my best. I am happy that the Mission has become a very well-known institution in Singapore. It has become bigger and better and I am happy about that. I made friends that I would not have come across had I not been involved in the Mission. We ensured we did not expand too much; concentrate on one thing and do it well. That was the advice from Dr Vasoo and the officials from the Ministries who were helping us.” Dr Vasoo was a high ranking and active social worker who became a Member of Parliament in Singapore from 1984 to 2001.

TDespite challenges in juggling his teaching job with his responsibilities at the Mission, Bhasi had not only successfully held things up at both ends, he had also ensured both flourished. He had also nurtured his passion for poetry, writing several Malayalam poems and publishing anthologies of the same. Through the years, he has indeed walked the path of a leader true to the Guru’s tenets.

Spreading Festive Cheer to Underprivileged Families

Ravi Subramanian

Festivals are cultural manifestations of community bonding, one of shared feelings, one of coming together to celebrate. It is a pinnacle of human bonding. So, when a partnership emerges that spreads this spirit of festivity to the underprivileged, it is the pinnacle of both human spirit and human bonding.

This is the spirit behind the Lighting Heart Lighting Homes (LHLH) – Sree Narayana Mission Singapore (SNM) partnership, launched in 2017.

For LHLH, it all started when a group of like-minded individuals had a calling. A call to make a small difference in the lives of underprivileged elderly and families. And a door opened, the festival of lights was around the corner.

These benevolent individuals came up with a novel way of spreading festive cheer. They decided to lighten up the festive moods of these underprivileged by visiting them and by giving festive goodies and “ang bao’s”.

Their initial target was modest – raise $2000, help 20 families. But the response from the donors was overwhelming. The team realised that many people in the community wanted to help, but needed a platform for this. Thus, LHLH was born. This was 2013.

They ended up sprucing several elderly homes, helping 80 households, 60 migrant workers and 28 boys at the Ramakrishnan Mission during its maiden initiative.

Today, LHLH continues to provide a platform for those who want to make a difference and connects them with those who will benefit from the help extended.

SNM’s mission is to serve with care and compassion, regardless of race, religion and language, all anchored on the profound philosophies of Sree Narayana Guru. It has been serving the community for 70 long years.

SNM understands community welfare work is a team work. It has been building partnerships assiduously.

In all these partnerships, the end goal is the same – let each member of the community lead a dignified life, empower each member to live a life to their full potential; where required, support to make this a reality.

And, there are many paths and each path can have many stages to reach this end goal. Once a path is identified, it is like a relay race; the partners hand over the batons. Each partner brings their best into the play. There are two winners in this race, the community member and the community.

So how does this SNM/LHLH partnership work?

LHLH benefits from SNM’s infrastructure to raise funds and to deliver longer term support to the needy. SNM benefits from LHLH’s last mile connectivity with the underprivileged family.

Once LHLH identifies a family, SNM brings its resources and taps into its own partner network to deliver succour to the family. There is a hand holding for a period of time.

A partnership of this kind lights hearts, lights homes and lights community. The ultimate winner is mankind!

Sree Narayana Mission (Singapore) – An Institution Inspired by the Life and Teachings of Sree Narayana Guru

Jayadev Unnithan

They came with just their shirts on their back and with a heart full of hope to make life better for kin in faraway places.

Difficult times loomed, but they pressed on inspired by the teachings of a venerable saint from their native place.

The end of World War II changed the political and economic landscape worldwide. In Singapore people were picking themselves up to rebuild lives after the ravages of the war. Our Pioneers were inspired by the teachings of the revered saint Sree Narayana Guru (1856 to 1928) who had emancipated the oppressed in Kerala. Revered Sree Narayana Guru instilled in the masses a sense of self-worth and values to live by in the Atmopadesa Satakam (One Hundred Verses in Self Instruction).

‘What is dear to another- that should spell endearment to me also. This is the correct policy. Therefore, what one does for his own good should be for the benefit of others.’

Atmopadesa Satakam Verse 22

Staying true to the Revered Guru’s teachings, our pioneers organised themselves to form a body that will promote social and welfare programs to uplift Singapore society. SNM was registered as a Society in 1948, and its programmes were open to all regardless of race, language or religion which parallels the Revered Guru’s teachings of embracing universal brotherhood. They lived by the principle that any action performed must be for the betterment of fellow men and society as a whole.

‘A compassionate man without any vested interest works both day and night for the welfare of others. On the other hand, a selfish man, desirous of his own good, toils day and night and comes again and again to frustration’.

Atmopadesa Satakam, Verse 23

SNM has stayed true to the principles of the teachings of the Revered Guru in providing selfless service to society. This verse sets the direction and sustains the drive to serve. Inspired by this, SNM has executed its services with full dedication and commitment, focusing fully on the interests of its beneficiaries.

SNM continued to serve the community in Singapore, enlarging the scope of services offered and reaching out to many. The expanded services included a Nursing Home, a welfare home for male destitute persons who require psychiatric care, and Senior Care Centres, and more recently for Dementia care. The outreach to the public at large was through programmes like meals-on- wheels, Helping Hands, educational bursaries and financial assistance.

LOOKING BACK – SREE NARAYANA MISSION HOME FOR THE AGED SICK AT BLOCK 87 & 89, CANBERRA ROAD

By R ASOKAN

Sree Narayana Mission (Singapore) was recently awarded the contract to run a second Nursing Home in Yishun. Looking back, I remember the time when the Sree Narayana Mission Home for the Aged Sick was located at 87 & 89 Canberra Road. During this period I served in the Executive Committee of the Sree Narayana Mission from 1978 to 2002.

Towards the end of 1978, Sree Narayana Mission (SNM) was informed that the Government’s Bases Economic Conversion Division was offering us two very imposing double-storied brick buildings at 87 and 89 Canberra Road, to manage a Home for the Aged. The Executive Committee was very pleased to take up the offer. The buildings were offered at a nominal rent and had the capacity to accommodate a total of 120 residents.

As the buildings needed substantial renovation before it could accommodate any residents, SNM renovated the premises and the buildings were ready by February 1979. We placed a portrait of Sree Narayana Guru in the new Home. The SNM Welfare Committee was entrusted with the management of the Home. It worked closely with the Aged Sick Advisory Committee in the running of the Home. A former employee of Naval Base Hospital was employed on a daily basis at a rate of $7.00 per day to look after the premises. The Home started operating on 18 Feb 1979 with four residents. A ‘Sree Narayana Mission Home for the Aged Fund’ was also launched.

One of our Executive Committee members, Mr Paran, volunteered to oversee the day-to-day running of the Home. The Mission’s Welfare Officer, Don Mathews, was then transferred to the Aged Home, and the Home employed an Assistant Nurse around the same time. We had a dedicated volunteer doctor, Dr Seng Kwang Meng, who used to regularly see the residents of the Home. Later, another doctor, Dr M G John, also agreed to render his services.

As the number of our residents increased, we needed some form of transport. In April 1980 a Datsun 120 Y station wagon was donated by Tan Chong & Co. By October 1980 there were 51 residents living in the Home. Some of the residents helped the Mission during its Annual Flag Day. There used to be many visitors, volunteers, and other well-wishers to the Home. The then Member of Parliament for Sembawang, Dr Tony Tan Keng Yam, visited the Home during the Chinese New Year celebrations to distribute ‘Hong Baos’ to residents. Dr Tony Tan also declared the Canberra premises officially open on 22 February 1981, at a ceremony well attended by SNM members.

The Home remained at this location until 22 October 1983, after which it shifted to a new premise at the former Sembawang Hospital. To assist in the shifting operations, we were helped by staff of the Singapore Armed Forces and members of Chong Hua Tong Tou Teck Hwee, a Chinese Association.

(Cont)

The Sembawang Hospital was located on a 5-acre plot of land along Canberra Road. What was underwhelming was that though the land was huge in size, the building was too small to house the residents we had hoped to cater for. The Home’s nursing and support staff would report to the Matron, Mr A Ananda Cumarasamy, who was in office for a few years

The Home had hosted many visits by distinguished guests. Among them was the late President of Singapore, Mr Wee Kim Wee, who visited the Home on 30 September 1988. He was given a tour of the Home and he met the in-house residents face-to-face. He was very pleased with what he saw and heard about the care and support given to the residents at the Home.

In July 1987, the Home was adopted by the RSAF Sembawang under the “Be-Friend“ scheme. Members of the SAF “adopted” individual residents and would visit them to break their loneliness and at least once a week at the Home.
On 15 July 1990, the first ceremonial pile driving for the construction of a new building in Yishun was graced by Dr Tony Tan Keng Yam, Chief Patron of the Project, the Minister of Education and MP for Sembawang GRC. The Minister, together with Mr Ng Pock Too, MP for Nee Soon Central, flagged off a Walkathon which was organised in conjunction with the ground breaking ceremony.

The Home’s Volunteer Corps was formed in March 1992. There were about 50 members and they would visit the Home on Saturdays from 2.00 p.m. to 5.30 p.m. to befriend residents. In their line of duty, they would provide emotional and psychological support to the elderly residents.

The new Home at 12 Yishun Ave 5 was completed in June 1993. Residents moved to the Home on 6 February 1994.

Friendships, Community – What the SNM Means to Me

G.P.Sasidharan

My association with Sree Narayana Mission began in 1968, when a good friend, Mr V. Srinivasan, who was then the secretary of the Mission, persuaded me to become a member of the executive committee. A year later, I became the secretary and served in that capacity, for the next four years, as Mr Srinivasan took on the unenviable task of organising and very successfully executing, the annual flag day. The importance of the flag day could not be over emphasised, as at that time, the Mission depended solely on the proceeds of the flag day to finance the welfare and social services, that the Mission, was providing to the community.

Another good friend, Mr D. Sambasivan joined the executive committee, the following year. He became the secretary later on. This association with the SNM, bonded us closely and strengthened our friendship. In our late twenties at that time, we were the youngest members in the Exco. Soon, a few older members labelled us ‘The three Ss’. I fondly recall that we were even called the ‘Thrimoorthi’ by, another ‘new’ friend, the late Mr N. Valalan. To some others, we were ‘The Three Musketeers.’ Though, as members of the ex-co, we often differed on principles and methods to be employed, the friendships formed, remained steadfast. I am also grateful to Mr R.Raveendran, with whom I’ve argued on many issues, but who has remained a good friend over the years. At ninety-one years of age, he is probably the oldest member of SNM today.

I’ve often been asked what I have gained from my association and ‘work’ with the Mission. I must stress that none of us ever considered it work. It was truly a learning experience that enriched us morally and spiritually. We learnt the various ways by which, we could serve the local community. We had to raise funds and in the process, we learnt valuable lessons in managing such funds, the varied ways we could help the community, form meaningful friendships and how to interact appropriately with the community at large. The icing on the cake, was that our friendships strengthened, new friendships were formed, all of which, have stood the test of time. Perhaps, Sree Narayana Guru’s guiding hand was directing us towards what the Mission has become today; an organisation in the forefront, in providing the best in welfare services, to the needy of all races, in our nation.

Now, as I am entering the eighth decade of my life, I am grateful for my fifty years of association with and service to Sree Narayana Mission. The one axiom of Guru’s teachings, that is forever embedded in me and which I pray that all of society will one day, accept and abide by, is, “Whichever be the religion, it is enough that man improves.”

Growing Spiritually through Volunteering

Foo Say Thye

He was an institutional stock dealer, caught up in the fast pace of the stock market every day, always on his toes, and with a short temper to match.

It all changed one day for Foo Say Thye. He had an epiphany during a friend’s wedding in 1994. “I had a friend who was a volunteer with disabled people. He had invited all the beneficiaries to his wedding. I felt inspired when I saw them at the wedding. I realised that what he was doing was meaningful, and interesting,” he explained.

That was a pivotal day for Say Thye. “I felt that my life had been meaningless. I wanted to help people. So I told my friend that I wanted to be a volunteer as well.” Say Thye’s friend advised him to contact the National Council of Social Services for training. As part of its orientation course, Say Thye visited the Sree Narayana Mission. There was no turning back for him after that.

The Sree Narayana Volunteers group had been formed in 1992 as a team who visit residents in the Sree Narayana Mission Home for the Aged every weekend. Say Thye joined them by the end of 1994.

But it was a rough start. “In the stock market, you have to think quickly and make quick decisions, so your temper is also quick. After becoming a volunteer, I had to change – because initially we had a lot of misunderstandings since the volunteers come from all walks of life. Monday to Friday, I have my quick temper and then on Saturday and Sunday, I have to change myself. I learnt a lot.”

Say Thye also grew spiritually, learning to harness the Guru’s grace. ‘When I started, we only had eight volunteers. I was a new volunteer then and didn’t know much about the Guru. One day, I just started praying in front of his picture at the Mission and asked for help to get more volunteers. I said to him, ‘If you want me to help you, you must help me.’ By our tenth anniversary, we had 300 volunteers. Whatever I wish for started to come true slowly. I feel that when you look upon the Guru, he will help you.”

Say Thye now helms SN Volunteers. His genuine wish to serve the residents at the SNM Home keeps him committed, “If you don’t go and visit them, the elderly will miss you. So we must find ways to sustain our activities. The benefit that we get is greater than what we are doing. People think that we are doing a lot but the benefit that we get is a lot. My temper was the first thing to change. It has also turned me in to a person with a better character – I am more approachable, I have more friends, more contacts, more people come to you for help, and people trust you more and are willing to help you more when they see you helping people. Even though you don’t start volunteering with this in mind, but this is the result. I am lucky. I am glad I went this way, for otherwise, I’d be a different person. I like the way I am now. Even my whole family is doing this. My son and daughter are the second generation running this group of SN Volunteers.”

Keeping the Family Together

Foo Ci En

Being a volunteer for nine years is long by any account. But for nineteen-year-old Foo Ci En, that equates to half her lifetime. “When I was in Primary Four, I started going with my parents for their volunteer work every Saturday. I’ve been volunteering since then because of my parents’ influence.” Her parents are Foo Say Thye and …, part of the Sree Narayana Volunteers group.

In fact, the spirit of volunteering forms the very foundation of their family, “My parents met and got married when they were volunteering at the Sree Narayana Mission Home for the Aged Sick,” she reveals. “So, from young I’ve been going with them to the Sree Narayana Mission Home for the Aged Sick. And I really enjoyed it – it’s very meaningful.”

The initial interest instilled in the young and impressionable Ci En could have easily fizzled out as she grew older and developed other pursuits. Instead, her childhood passion for volunteering only strengthened and became more entrenched with maturity and the passage of time. “When I was a young kid I didn’t understand what I was doing – I just followed my parents and felt happy doing it. But now I realise that it helps people and makes their day. And so, I want to continue. I feel the elderly will not enjoy their Saturday if we don’t hold our activities for them. Even on days when I am not well, I will still go down. I feel like it’s a mission that I have to carry out”.

Nowadays, Ci En is a more frequent face than her parents within the SNV group. “I became an active volunteer in 2015 and since my parents started other volunteer groups, I am now more active than my parents at SNV.” She is currently on the SNV Committee, creating more programmes that will bring joy to the elderly residents of the Home, “If you don’t go for one Saturday, the following week the elderly will ask you why you were not there.” Thus, she persists in ensuring that the SNV’s objectives are achieved even when challenges arise, “Passion is needed for volunteer work, passion is important to sustain this – to continue to do this on weekends instead of enjoying the weekend with your family.”

Perhaps, that is why families tend to be get roped into volunteering – it allows them to be together while the volunteers pursue their passion, which happens with a lot of the SNV members. In fact, Ci En’s brother is also part of the SNV Committee and is equally committed as she is. This practice of ‘family volunteers’ holds a deep significance for Ci En, “Parents are imparting values to their children from young when they do this,” she reasons. Ci En’s parents had patiently done that with the two siblings and Ci En hopes to extend the tradition, “I will continue even when I go to University, and after I marry, I will bring my husband along to volunteer and later, my children. We will continue into the third generation.”

“In the three years that I have been the CEO of this nursing home, we have said goodbye to our residents when they pass on. Today we are saying goodbye to a resident who is moving on to a new phase in his life. This is a rare occurrence. So each time such an occurrence takes place, it’s for us that one starfish moment and we celebrate it.”

S. Devendran, CEO, Sree Narayana Mission Nursing Home

Empowering Dignified Lives – A Love Story

“There is no me without her, just like, there is no her without me”, says Mr. Velappan Vellaiyan with his eyes lit, looking intently at his newly betrothed, Ms. Savithiri Kaliappan. They are sitting close to each other on his bed at the Sree Narayana Mission (SNM) Nursing Home.

“I was lost in life, but found meaning when I started visiting him” responds Ms. Savithiri thoughtfully, holding his hands.

These may read like lines from the romantic Mills & Boon novels. Novels people read, enjoy and possibly forget.

However, Mr. Velappan’s romantic story is not meant to be forgotten, for it is real, as it signifies a societal change, one of empowering individuals to lead dignified lives. A transformation that makes our community more compassionate and inclusive.

Firstly, this is a story of two elders, both over 70 years, coming together to help each other. Something rare.

Secondly, the hero, a wheel-chair bound resident in a nursing home, is motivated to walk when he finds purpose in life. Something miraculous.

Thirdly, the couple decide to get married with the hero moving to a home of their own, to lead a life of dignity. Something blissful.

For SNM, it’s a new first. An incredible experience in supporting a resident to fulfil his dreams and empowering the couple to lead a life on their own terms.

And the upshot, they are re-integrating back into the community. Can the script get any better?

It all starts in the 60’s. “We are buddies from the same kampung. I remember him as an energetic and charming young person” recalls Ms. Savithiri, nostalgically thinking of her Silat Road home and Mr. Velappan’s Henderson locality.

Mr. Velappan, a first-generation immigrant, is a movie buff. “I have even watched English and Mandarin movies without understanding anything, in my younger days”. Tamil film songs were his best friend.

They go their ways and lose touch. She marries a Ceylonese Tamil and he marries a girl of his choice. Their families grow, she has a son and he, a daughter. He works as a helper at coffee shops and at construction sites. She works as an administrative assistant in schools.

Mr. Velappan and his wife separate. He stayed with his married daughter initially, but things do not work out well. He suffers a bad fall. And the struggle shows on him.

Serendipity brings them back together. In 2004, while participating in a skills training workshop he meets his old kampung friend.

Recollecting, Ms. Savithiri says “I was shocked. He was very weak, not the youthful, energetic person that I had seen”. They reminiscence about their childhood days over a coffee and the conversation drifts to the current situation. She realises he is alone, struggling with a weak body and painful knees.

Her kind-hearted instinct takes over. She begins meeting him regularly.

Ms. Savithiri helps him through his lowest point when he was bedridden and hospitalized. He recalls emotionally “She saved my life, she is my god, I would not have survived without her”.

In 2008, Mr.Velappan moves into SNM when his health worsens. Ms. Savithiri lives in her Bukit Merah rental flat by herself after her husband passes away in 2009. Her son is estranged. She visits Mr. Velappan regularly, despite the one-hour bus ride from her home.

Mr. Vellapan says “She was the only visitor. She would cook my favourite dishes, buy vadai, kerapu, nasi goreng”. He would eagerly wait for her visits. With her continual affection and SNM’s care, his health improves. Their bond grows deeper.

They decide to take the next bold step, to get married.

“I am excited to start this new life with him. What else do we need other than each other’s company in our twilight years” Ms. Savithiri says with conviction when probed. Adding on, she declares “I will take him home, cook for him, take care of him. He has simple needs. I intend to go out with him and enjoy our last years together”.

SNM supports their decision after reviewing the case carefully. It is made easier, as the staff have been working on his health and see an improvement. Ms. Illamaran Kalaiselvi, from the social work team, becomes a mentor guide to them. She has been supporting him for close to a year.

Friday, April 12th, 2019 arrives. It is their big day, their wedding.

SNM puts its weight behind the wedding. The staff rises to the occasion. It is a family wedding in their own home.

It is an elegant affair with the couple donning traditional attires, taking their marriage vows. Dignitaries grace the occasion and join the celebrations. Cake cutting, heartfelt toasts, buffet lunch, photo shoots and trishaw rides with Cycling Without Age Singapore to a nearby temple, all culminating in a happy farewell, as they are chauffeured to their ‘new’ home.

There are tears of joy. Mr. Velappan’s best friend Ms. Vanitha, a SNM resident, cries “You were my best friend. I will miss you now”.

The couple’s newly spruced up home is ready to welcome them.

They are aware life will present its challenges, and marriage is only an initial step. But they are wiser, for they have been through it all. Their needs are simple. They understand each other. And they will make it happen for they have shown they are alchemists.

In this true-life story, the lovely moments are not counted by age, but by the wrinkles and affection. This is a saga of two individuals, trying to fathom the meaning of their life with a steely determination to walk back into the community.

#1747 (Level 1/Room 7/Bed47) will be immortalized in the walls of SNM. This is where a new life began, “The Love Story of SNM”, a shining example of human triumph.
We wish the lovely couple a blissful life. We will continue to support. We want Shakespeare’s words to come true in their lives – “All’s Well, That Ends Well”.