Sree Narayana Mission (Singapore)

Keeping the Family Together

Foo Ci En

Being a volunteer for nine years is long by any account. But for nineteen-year-old Foo Ci En, that equates to half her lifetime. “When I was in Primary Four, I started going with my parents for their volunteer work every Saturday. I’ve been volunteering since then because of my parents’ influence.” Her parents are Foo Say Thye and …, part of the Sree Narayana Volunteers group.

In fact, the spirit of volunteering forms the very foundation of their family, “My parents met and got married when they were volunteering at the Sree Narayana Mission Home for the Aged Sick,” she reveals. “So, from young I’ve been going with them to the Sree Narayana Mission Home for the Aged Sick. And I really enjoyed it – it’s very meaningful.”

The initial interest instilled in the young and impressionable Ci En could have easily fizzled out as she grew older and developed other pursuits. Instead, her childhood passion for volunteering only strengthened and became more entrenched with maturity and the passage of time. “When I was a young kid I didn’t understand what I was doing – I just followed my parents and felt happy doing it. But now I realise that it helps people and makes their day. And so, I want to continue. I feel the elderly will not enjoy their Saturday if we don’t hold our activities for them. Even on days when I am not well, I will still go down. I feel like it’s a mission that I have to carry out”.

Nowadays, Ci En is a more frequent face than her parents within the SNV group. “I became an active volunteer in 2015 and since my parents started other volunteer groups, I am now more active than my parents at SNV.” She is currently on the SNV Committee, creating more programmes that will bring joy to the elderly residents of the Home, “If you don’t go for one Saturday, the following week the elderly will ask you why you were not there.” Thus, she persists in ensuring that the SNV’s objectives are achieved even when challenges arise, “Passion is needed for volunteer work, passion is important to sustain this – to continue to do this on weekends instead of enjoying the weekend with your family.”

Perhaps, that is why families tend to be get roped into volunteering – it allows them to be together while the volunteers pursue their passion, which happens with a lot of the SNV members. In fact, Ci En’s brother is also part of the SNV Committee and is equally committed as she is. This practice of ‘family volunteers’ holds a deep significance for Ci En, “Parents are imparting values to their children from young when they do this,” she reasons. Ci En’s parents had patiently done that with the two siblings and Ci En hopes to extend the tradition, “I will continue even when I go to University, and after I marry, I will bring my husband along to volunteer and later, my children. We will continue into the third generation.”

“In the three years that I have been the CEO of this nursing home, we have said goodbye to our residents when they pass on. Today we are saying goodbye to a resident who is moving on to a new phase in his life. This is a rare occurrence. So each time such an occurrence takes place, it’s for us that one starfish moment and we celebrate it.”

S. Devendran, CEO, Sree Narayana Mission Nursing Home

Empowering Dignified Lives – A Love Story

“There is no me without her, just like, there is no her without me”, says Mr. Velappan Vellaiyan with his eyes lit, looking intently at his newly betrothed, Ms. Savithiri Kaliappan. They are sitting close to each other on his bed at the Sree Narayana Mission (SNM) Nursing Home.

“I was lost in life, but found meaning when I started visiting him” responds Ms. Savithiri thoughtfully, holding his hands.

These may read like lines from the romantic Mills & Boon novels. Novels people read, enjoy and possibly forget.

However, Mr. Velappan’s romantic story is not meant to be forgotten, for it is real, as it signifies a societal change, one of empowering individuals to lead dignified lives. A transformation that makes our community more compassionate and inclusive.

Firstly, this is a story of two elders, both over 70 years, coming together to help each other. Something rare.

Secondly, the hero, a wheel-chair bound resident in a nursing home, is motivated to walk when he finds purpose in life. Something miraculous.

Thirdly, the couple decide to get married with the hero moving to a home of their own, to lead a life of dignity. Something blissful.

For SNM, it’s a new first. An incredible experience in supporting a resident to fulfil his dreams and empowering the couple to lead a life on their own terms.

And the upshot, they are re-integrating back into the community. Can the script get any better?

It all starts in the 60’s. “We are buddies from the same kampung. I remember him as an energetic and charming young person” recalls Ms. Savithiri, nostalgically thinking of her Silat Road home and Mr. Velappan’s Henderson locality.

Mr. Velappan, a first-generation immigrant, is a movie buff. “I have even watched English and Mandarin movies without understanding anything, in my younger days”. Tamil film songs were his best friend.

They go their ways and lose touch. She marries a Ceylonese Tamil and he marries a girl of his choice. Their families grow, she has a son and he, a daughter. He works as a helper at coffee shops and at construction sites. She works as an administrative assistant in schools.

Mr. Velappan and his wife separate. He stayed with his married daughter initially, but things do not work out well. He suffers a bad fall. And the struggle shows on him.

Serendipity brings them back together. In 2004, while participating in a skills training workshop he meets his old kampung friend.

Recollecting, Ms. Savithiri says “I was shocked. He was very weak, not the youthful, energetic person that I had seen”. They reminiscence about their childhood days over a coffee and the conversation drifts to the current situation. She realises he is alone, struggling with a weak body and painful knees.

Her kind-hearted instinct takes over. She begins meeting him regularly.

Ms. Savithiri helps him through his lowest point when he was bedridden and hospitalized. He recalls emotionally “She saved my life, she is my god, I would not have survived without her”.

In 2008, Mr.Velappan moves into SNM when his health worsens. Ms. Savithiri lives in her Bukit Merah rental flat by herself after her husband passes away in 2009. Her son is estranged. She visits Mr. Velappan regularly, despite the one-hour bus ride from her home.

Mr. Vellapan says “She was the only visitor. She would cook my favourite dishes, buy vadai, kerapu, nasi goreng”. He would eagerly wait for her visits. With her continual affection and SNM’s care, his health improves. Their bond grows deeper.

They decide to take the next bold step, to get married.

“I am excited to start this new life with him. What else do we need other than each other’s company in our twilight years” Ms. Savithiri says with conviction when probed. Adding on, she declares “I will take him home, cook for him, take care of him. He has simple needs. I intend to go out with him and enjoy our last years together”.

SNM supports their decision after reviewing the case carefully. It is made easier, as the staff have been working on his health and see an improvement. Ms. Illamaran Kalaiselvi, from the social work team, becomes a mentor guide to them. She has been supporting him for close to a year.

Friday, April 12th, 2019 arrives. It is their big day, their wedding.

SNM puts its weight behind the wedding. The staff rises to the occasion. It is a family wedding in their own home.

It is an elegant affair with the couple donning traditional attires, taking their marriage vows. Dignitaries grace the occasion and join the celebrations. Cake cutting, heartfelt toasts, buffet lunch, photo shoots and trishaw rides with Cycling Without Age Singapore to a nearby temple, all culminating in a happy farewell, as they are chauffeured to their ‘new’ home.

There are tears of joy. Mr. Velappan’s best friend Ms. Vanitha, a SNM resident, cries “You were my best friend. I will miss you now”.

The couple’s newly spruced up home is ready to welcome them.

They are aware life will present its challenges, and marriage is only an initial step. But they are wiser, for they have been through it all. Their needs are simple. They understand each other. And they will make it happen for they have shown they are alchemists.

In this true-life story, the lovely moments are not counted by age, but by the wrinkles and affection. This is a saga of two individuals, trying to fathom the meaning of their life with a steely determination to walk back into the community.

#1747 (Level 1/Room 7/Bed47) will be immortalized in the walls of SNM. This is where a new life began, “The Love Story of SNM”, a shining example of human triumph.
We wish the lovely couple a blissful life. We will continue to support. We want Shakespeare’s words to come true in their lives – “All’s Well, That Ends Well”.

Feeling the Wind in their Hair

Ravi Subramanian.

Is there a partner who could run a programme where seniors face no social isolation, and get an opportunity to feel the wind in their hair?

Yes, there is. It is Cycling Without Age Singapore (CWA) under the Temasek Foundation Cares Moving Generations programme. The Sree Narayana Mission Singapore (SNM) – CWA partnership was facilitated by the Agency of Integrated Care (AIC). The MOU was signed in 2017.

This is a programme that gives youth opportunities to engage with seniors in an active setting, allowing them to have a meaningful dialogue with them and to learn from them about the past. The settings are the one-hour trishaw rides piloted by trained youth volunteers from CWA.

At SNM, a trishaw waits on the weekends. This is an opportunity for the residents to dress up, to go out, to snack, to enjoy nature, to wave to the gallery, to engage the community, to chat with the youth, andto walk down the memory lane. It’s opportunities galore, and it means a lot to the residents!

The vintage three-wheeler trishaws with their conspicuous red coloured seats have become a common sight in Yishun, especially on weekends. They can be spotted at the parks, near the lakes or the play areas with regally seated and well-groomed elderly passengers, some sporting floppy hats, being safely pedalled by cheerful youngsters. These are some real selfie, wefie photo moments and the youthful volunteers revel in that!

In fact, a buzz was created when the 107 year-old SNM resident, Mdm. Yeo Iu went on a CWA trishaw ride. Apparently, a world record for the most senior resident taking a ride on a trishaw. A truly amazing feat!
There is synergy in this partnership. The partners have a shared mission and their values are aligned. Both are exploring ways to improve quality of life for elders and empower them to lead dignified lives.
For youth volunteers, these trishaw rides are a bridge that connects the past with the future. SNM is the best place to put this to practice.

And it shows. The partnership has blossomed. The number of rides has grown. More volunteers have joined, more are getting trained and elders are enjoying more rides than before. People are noticing it.
Happy memories create happy association. Owen, a regular volunteer from CWA is a shining example. He has developed a close bond with some of the residents. They seek each other and the camaraderie they enjoy during these scenic rides speaks volumes of what these rides can accomplish.

It’s not only feeling that wind in the hair, it’s also experiencing that enduring joy of life!!
Let this community keep growing. It benefits all.

Compassion – Sabu

കരുണ എന്ന . വരദാനം

” ഒരുപീഢയെറുമ്പിനും വരു

ത്തരുതെന്നുള്ളൊ രനു കമ്പയും”

ശ്രേഷ്ടനായ ശ്രീ നാരായണ ഗുരു 1914 ൽ എഴുതിയ” അനുകമ്പാദശക”ത്തിലെ പ്രാരംഭ വരികളാണ് മേലുദ്ധരിച്ചത്. ഒരു എറുമ്പിനോടു പോലും കരുണ കാട്ടണമെന്ന് ശഠിക്കുന്ന തരം വികാരമാണ് ഈ കവിതയുടെ ആത്മാവ്

നമ്മുടെ ഹൃദയത്തിൽ നിറയണമെന്ന് നാം ആഗ്രഹിക്കുന്ന ദൈവിക ചൈതന്യത്തിന്റെ അത്ര തന്നെ അളവിൽ കരുണയും നിറയാൻ പരമേശ്വരനോട് അപേക്ഷിക്കാനാണ് ഗുരുജി ആഹ്വാനം ചെയ്യുന്നത് അതെ, “കരുണ” എന്നത് ദൈവതേജസിന്റെ ഒരു വരദാനമാണെന്ന് തന്നെ.

കരുണ എന്ന ദിവ്യ വികാരത്തെ ആപേക്ഷികമായിട്ടല്ലാതെ, ഒരു പൂർണ അളവിൽ തന്റെ തന്നെ ജീവിതത്തിലും നവോത്ഥാന ചിന്തകളിലും പഠിപ്പിയ്ക്കലുകളിലും പ്രതിഫലിപ്പിച്ചതിനാലാകണം ഗുരുജി ജനകോടികളുടെ ആരാധകനായിത്തീർന്നത്. അദ്ദേഹത്തിന്റെ നവോത്ഥാന തത്വ സംഹിതകൾ ‘കരുണ’ യുമായി എങ്ങിനെ ബന്ധപ്പെട്ടു കിടക്കുന്നു എന്ന് നോക്കാം

മതമല്ല മറിച്ച് മനുഷ്യനായിരുന്നു ഗുരുജിയുടെ വിഷയം – മതമേതായാലും മനുഷ്യൻ നന്നായാൽ മതി എന്ന് പറഞ്ഞതിന്റെ സൂചന അതായിരുന്നു. മനുഷ്യനിലെ ഉച്ച നീ ചത്വചിന്തകളെ എതിർത്ത് സമഭാവത്തിന്റെ ആത്മാവിന് ഊടുംപാവും നൽകാൻ തന്റെ ജീവിതം ഉഴിഞ്ഞു വയ്ക്കാൻ അദ്ദേഹത്തെ പ്രേരിപ്പിച്ചതും മഹത്തായ കാരുണ്യമെന്ന ദിവ്യ ഗുണം തന്നെ ആയിരുന്നു.

മതമല്ല മറിച്ച് മനുഷ്യനായിരുന്നു ഗുരുജിയുടെ വിഷയം – മതമേതായാലും മനുഷ്യൻ നന്നായാൽ മതി എന്ന് പറഞ്ഞതിന്റെ സൂചന അതായിരുന്നു. മനുഷ്യനിലെ ഉച്ച നീ ചത്വചിന്തകളെ എതിർത്ത് സമഭാവത്തിന്റെ ആത്മാവിന് ഊടുംപാവും നൽകാൻ തന്റെ ജീവിതം ഉഴിഞ്ഞു വയ്ക്കാൻ അദ്ദേഹത്തെ പ്രേരിപ്പിച്ചതും മഹത്തായ കാരുണ്യമെന്ന ദിവ്യ ഗുണം തന്നെ ആയിരുന്നു.

കരുണ എന്ന വികാരത്തിന്റെ പൂർത്തീകരണം കർമ്മത്തിലൂടെ മാത്രമേ സാദ്ധ്യമാകൂ എന്ന് ഗുരുജീ ഓർമിപ്പിക്കുന്നു. കണ്ണടച്ചിരുന്ന് ധ്യാനിക്കലല്ല കർമ്മം എന്നും നിരാലമ്പർക്കും , പീഡിതർക്കും, നിന്ദിതർക്കും ആശയറ്റവർക്കും അതു പോലെ അർഹിക്കുന്ന ഏവർക്കും സഹായം ചെയ്യുന്നതാണ് യഥാർത്ഥ കർമമെന്നും ഗുരുജീ ഓർമിപ്പിച്ചു. ഗുരുജിയുടെ പേരിലുള്ള വൃദ്ധ പരിപാലന സ്ഥാപനങ്ങളും മറ്റ് ധർമ്മ സ്ഥാപനങ്ങളും ഗുരുജിയുടെ കരുണാ സിദ്ധാന്തത്തെ പുനരുജജീവിപ്പിക്കുന്ന ഓജസുറ്റ സാക്ഷ്യങ്ങൾ തന്നെയാണ്.

ഹൃദയത്തിൽ കരുണ വറ്റിപ്പോയ , തുടർന്നും മനുഷ്യനായി ജീവിക്കുന്നവരെ കുറിച്ച് ” അനുകമ്പാദശക”ത്തിലെ രണ്ടു വരികൾ കൂടി കുറിയ്ക്കട്ടെ.

” അരുളില്ല യതെങ്കില സ്ഥി തോൽ
സിര നാറുന്നൊരു ടമ്പു താനവൻ”

ജാതിയുടെയും മതത്തിന്റെയും വർണ്ണത്തിന്റെയും പേരിൽ പോരെടുക്കുന്ന , കരുണ കാട്ടാത്ത അജ്ഞരായ സമൂഹത്തെ ഗുരുജി
” നാറുന്നൊരുമ്പു താനവൻ” എന്ന് വിശേഷിപ്പിച്ചത് ശ്രദ്ധേയമാണ്.

സഹജീവികളെയും സമജീവികളെയും സ്നേഹിച്ചും കരുണ കാണിച്ചും ജീവിക്കുന്ന ഒരു പുതു സമൂഹത്തെ വാർത്തെടുക്കാൻ ഗുരുജിയുടെ ആദർശങ്ങൾ പങ്കു വെച്ച് നമ്മാലാവത് നമുക്കും ശ്രമിക്കാം.

Mathew PV

Aathira Jeyadev

Having practically grown up as a ‘child of the Mission’, Aathira Jeyadev firmly believes that the Sree Narayana Mission can have something for everyone, and mean something to everyone.

Aathira’s connection with the Mission can be traced to her grandparents, Mr and Mrs Unnithan, who were among its early members. Her sprightly grandmother still actively participates in its events, at the ripe old age of (XXX). Thus, it is no surprise that the urge to serve the Mission was seeded in young Aathira, naturally and unconsciously, in the course of the time she spent there. She recalls, “I have grown up, and grown, with the Mission. From enjoying the games as a child, I started organising them and, and then performing for the events. Every time we went to the Mission, I saw the elderly at the Mission’s Home for the Aged Sick, and always wanted to interact with them. It was always at the back of my mind. So, after my ‘A’ Level Examinations, I asked my father whether I could volunteer at the Mission. That’s how I ended up serving at its Dementia Care Centre first. I realise that being there for the elderly is something that I enjoy”. After that encouraging start, Aathira has taken on other roles in the Mission.

This deeper involvement with the Mission has opened Aathira’s eyes to the scope of its activities. “I now realise that the Mission caters to single parent families, low income groups, and others – not just the elderly. So, anyone with a heart to volunteer can come to the Mission and find something that they can do,” she shares.

Aathira feels that all this bodes well for the Mission’s ability to attract more likeminded people, and, thus, continue being an integral part of the evolving Singaporean society, as it has done since its very foundation. “The Mission has the facilities and the people to do much more, and I would like to see the Mission grow in that way. There are more youth coming in. We recently had a Youth Symposium called SOWOKE, as part of the 70th anniversary celebrations, and we heard the youth on their take regarding volunteering and service. So, we are also learning what drives today’s youth, to stay relevant.”

That includes staying relevant to the layman, who should be able to view the Mission as a place they can enjoy being at. “It is nice to have events that can attract the everyday person to chill out at the Mission, like boardgames, etc.” These are, indeed, the plans in the pipeline for the Mission’s new premises at Race Course Road, where activities can be held without impinging on the operations at the Home for the Aged in Yishun. “I am looking forward to hanging out at the Mission in Race Course Road; we can have workshops, the guys can plan soccer games, we can hold one-day events to attract people,” Aathira enthuses, as she envisions the future of the Mission.

Marriage had brought the three of them to Singapore, but the Sree Narayana Mission brought Indulekha, Sneha and Indu Suresh together to forge a special friendship.

Indulekha was the first to arrive in Singapore and had joined her Singapore-born husband’s family in their regular activities at the Mission. “My children enjoy attending the classes here and mingling with the others; my daughter who first came here at age two is now 23 and she’s teaching the small children today. I made friends with the other two ladies in the Mission and we became close, like a family; we share our problems, we share our happiness, we share ideas with the older ladies. During the Chathayam festivities, this feels like our ancestral home, so much so that we don’t even want to go back to India for those celebrations. We started to dress alike even, and became like sisters. The bonding feels great and we even have activities outside of the Mission.”

For Sneha, the friendship was life-changing. “I had been in Singapore for 10 years before I first came to the Mission. I had no interaction with anyone in that time. My mother-in-law’s friend had ‘forced’ me to visit the Mission one day, saying I’ll make a lot of friends here. When my Singaporean husband came to the Mission with me, he renewed friendships with his childhood friends, including the husbands of my two friends. I am very happy about that, this feels like home. It’s as though the three of us have one mind, we have the same wavelength and we have great teamwork. Onam celebrations means being at the Mission to us. We’ll even discuss our Onam attire two months ahead, to dress alike and match everything. I cannot imagine what I’d be without the Mission. There is a huge difference in me – from the first 10 years and now; I used to be serious, now I’m jovial; I was always at home before and interacting only with my children and husband but now I go shopping with my friends. I appreciate the big exposure I had after coming to the Mission, so when I became a Singapore citizen five years ago, I immediately signed up for membership. I became a voluntary Malayalam language teacher here.”

Indu Suresh had been attending the Mission’s events since 1998, and says she will never miss its Onam and Chathayam events. “It’s the homely atmosphere here,” she reasons, and adds, “Our children have also become very close, we are like one family. The children have formed their own group; they play soccer together, they go out together on Sundays, they have meals. Sometimes we don’t even know that they have made their plans to meet and go out. I hope this friendship in the second generation continues, I am happy they are continuing the friendship.”

“This friendship is priceless, and our children’s friendship too; I get goose-bumps thinking about it. It will grow stronger over the years. It is all the Guru’s blessings – he gave us the unity,” Sneha adds.

Indulekha highlights the positive traits their children have gained from the Guru’s values that permeate the Mission. “The Mission makes us a better person, and our children also. They learn the Guru’s teachings – they learn about their own religion and how to respect other religions – that’s very important. My son even represented the Mission in an Inter-Religious talk last year when my husband was out of town. They also see the old folks at the Mission’s Home and learn about palliative care,” Indulekha relates. “Every weekend we look forward to coming to the Mission. I can’t imagine life without the Mission,” Indulekha quips.

“Even when it’s not an event, we come to the Mission, to help others in their activities. It’s our second home,” Indu Suresh concludes.

S.Adikesavan

Around the time Sree Narayana Guru launched his socio-economic-religious reform movement in India’s southern state of Kerala, there was a parallel resistance movement in the neighbouring region of Tamil Nadu where radical leader E.V. Ramaswamy Naickar organised people against caste and its oppressive framework.

Unlike the Naickar “line”, Guru’s transformative work was a continuum in the tradition of religious reformers who started spreading the message of unity and the fraternity of mankind, overriding the deeply-entrenched caste consciousness which has been the defining feature of Indian society over the ages.

The most critical difference in the Guru’s approach, was its balance of the religious, ethical, social and economic content, founded on a principle of universal brotherhood and compassion for everyone. At the time he formulated his solution and even now, it remains distinctively original, intrinsically constructive and innately humane. The Guru’s compass of thinking was far ahead of his time.

If the social fabric of Kerala stands out as an example of a durable compact of people belonging to different castes, communities and religions holding together as a unique laboratory of cohesive diversity, the credit in a large measure should go to the “Light of Sivagiri”. Guru’s teachings have a contemporary significance in the multi-religious, multi-cultural and multi-linguistic world that we live in now. Guru realised that for a change of heart to be permanent it has to be based on a vision of love and brotherhood. It cannot be sustained on negativity and hatred.

Guru’s relevance is for all times and all climes. This is because his approach was constructive, spiritual and inclusive. That’s why, Guru’s philosophy continues to inspire people even today. In his authentic biography of the Guru, noted scholar Prof M.K. Sanoo writes: “This is how ideas work. They transmit from heart to heart. Speeches and exhortations are but catalysts”. Guru believed that people have to undergo a change of heart on their own, based on inner convictions and the realisation that all humans are equal intrinsically.

This, I believe, is a continuation of the reformatory work attempted by others over the years in India. Guru stood out because he chose the line of least resistance and genuinely felt that inner change should be the basis for this progression.

Of late, there have been attempts to portray the Guru as someone who was not in this unbroken tradition of our saints. To my mind, this is patently wrong and perceptibly mischievous. The Guru was one of the most important links in the long line of our sages and seers who responded in their own way to the issues of their times.

Sometimes, in India’s history, this required the coldness of logic and the sharpness of intellect which Adi Sankara brought in. At other times it called for the highlighting of the humaneness of spirit, catholicity of outlook, the universality of mankind and the common bases of love for all, which saints like the Guru expounded.

But, there is a unitary thread which flows through all the great saints of India whether it was Nanak, the Buddha, Vardhamana Mahaveera, Adi Sankara, Ramanujacharya or Sree Narayana Guru. The wellsprings of their thinking and philosophy lies within the folds of what we have come to perceive as Hindu/Bharathiya culture, not outside of it. Any attempt to demarcate the Guru’s legacy as outside of this holistic Bharathiya culture and tradition does not correspond to the basic religious-spiritual transformation that he aimed at.

I have no better authority than the Nobel-prize winning great French writer and thinker Romain Rolland who said of the Guru: “His teachings, permeated with the philosophy of Sankara, shows evidence of a striking difference of temperament compared with the mysticism of Bengal… He was, one might say, a Jnanin of action, a grand religious intellectual, who had a keen living sense of the people and of social necessities. He has contributed greatly to the elevation of the oppressed classes in south India, and his work has been associated at certain times with that of Gandhi.”

The Guru, it can be said, refined the non-dualistic principle of Adi Sankara into a contemporary mode, through emphasis on development of the self with education, egalitarianism and coexistence of humanity. Essentially, the Guru’s way out of social degeneration and the oppressive structure of castes was from “within” the basic structure of what we understand as Hinduism.

The Guru sought to bring about a revolution through transformation of thought, not through violent, negative or hateful means. As the world looks for answers of human integration which only can sustain peace, prosperity and indeed our collective coexistence, the Guru’s philosophy offers hope. There is an urgent and indubitable need to spread his thinking to wider audiences.